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Thread: Lust or Love?? I think I fell for him?? Any advice/opinions!!!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    USA, FL, Tampa

    Lust or Love?? I think I fell for him?? Any advice/opinions!!!

    I think a teacher and I have developed feelings for eachother? Is this even Normal???

    He taught me in a subject that wasn’t my strongest, so I’d always coming for extra help after school, and naturally we got to know each other, but as the year came to an end, I started to realize that he was treating me different, I started to realize that sometimes he would flirt with me, but he really never did anything that made me feel weird or uncomfortable but after awhile, he started doing things, like making fun of little things I would do in class, or he would say, ‘I love you, I just want you to know that.’, or you will always have a special place in my heart. and when he saw me before graduation, he told me I looked beautiful, and said that this year has been a year he won’t forget, because he feels that he has become a better person, teacher, everything because I opened his eyes to giving people an opportunity to succeed.The year was full of moments like that.

    Now, I am starting to question how I feel about him, It’s like he slowly seduced me all year? I just don’t know if these ‘feelings’ between us are real? I graduated so I am no longer a student at school and I just don’t know why all of a sudden, I find myself feeling this way. Its like as long as I was a student at the same school that he was my teacher I would never have even looked at him like that, but now, Its like things have changed, and I don’t know what to think about the situation. He never bluntly asked me out or anything, but he did say at the end of the year that he did like me, and he hoped that any guy who dates me realizes how lucky they are.

    He would make these remarks like, I saw him in the hallway and he came out of one of the classroom and told these kids, get to class, because there is a beautiful girl in the courtyard, and brushed my shoulder, as he passed by. He would also tell other kids(as a joke), that they should not talk to me, even make eye contact with me. I am a rather outgoing and kinda loud and crazzy person( in a good so I can be a bit overwhelming if you don’t know me, and he was always like.” I am used to her, but if your not…just leave her alone.” I didn’t really know how to respond.

    I will be 19 next February, and he will be 25 this August. I know all of this must sound pretty stupid, but I just wanted to see what others thought, because sometimes people get caught up and don’t see things clearly, and I am starting to wonder if this is just my mind playing tricks on me, or if maybe something is there. In all honesty, I do like him, as we did spend a lot of time together the past year 1/2, but I am also fully aware that teacher/Student relationships are usually frowned upon, so thats why I felt so unclear as to what I should do next. Do I test the waters with him, or just forget him all together? Does any of this, even sound like he really has feelings for me?? Its sort of like, my heart tells me one thing, but the reality of the way people think makes me feel like I have to think otherwise, even though I graduated… I don’t want either of us to get a bad reputation, and I know that people could think things happened before Graduation. I am just really confused,

    What do you guys think about all of this?!?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    New England
    It certainly does sound like something grew there...but often what one takes for interest is another person being nice.

    At the beginning of your post I thought to myself, a teacher in his position shouldn't be behaving or saying things like that, it is highly inapropriate in his profession. Not only that but, is he doing this with other students as well...what is the chance he is not as innocent as one would assume a teacher to be?? These thoughts may be overkill, I know. And it is good that he never initiated anything while being your teacher either!

    I would advise caution in any decision.

    Now that you have graduated and are no longer his student, if you really want to know the answer you know where to find him. Don't be surprised if he's not interested or if he is treating other students the same way. Like I said, it just may be his style and not personal to him.

    Regardless, you won't know the answer unless you ask the question.

    "My will shall shape the future. Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man's doing but my own. I am the force; I can clear any obstacle before me or I can be lost in the maze. My choice; my responsibility; win or lose, only I hold the key to my destiny."

    Elaine Maxwell


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