Need lot's o' advice

[purplehaze]

Hey everybody, since I've been just kind of figuring this stuff out on my own I figured I'd find some place where I can get some advice. My gf of 2 years and I broke up a little over 2 months ago. It was a very good relationship up until the last 4 months when she started grad school. I pretty much got dropped and forgotten about for her new friends. It really sucked cause it happened the day after christmas. Anyway, I can tell you it hurt a lot. I'm really just now getting over it all. Luckily I have some good friends...too bad they don't really live close to me (closest one is an hour a way) and the friends I have in town are kind of boring. With that said I don't really have the opportunity to go out a lot and meet people which presents my second problem. I've always been what ya'll call a "shy boy". Yes, I do have a problem socializing and meeting new people, especially girls. It's not really about rejection, I can handle that, it's just I'm afraid of having nothing to say. Sorry about the long noob post, I just thought I'd get everything out on the table. I could also use some advice...thanks.

[dewshine]

I always thought the best way to meet someone like you would be to go do social activities that you like doing...then you are with people that you have at least one interest in common with! Also you're in an atmosphere where you already have a topic (the activity you are doing). If you don't have any interests like this then maybe you should try something new?

Give it a try....

[IKnowWhatToDo]

I feel you man. About a year ago I broke up with a guy I was with for a little over two years and we were engaged. Don't worry you are not gonna die and the pain with eventually subside. Be thankfull that you don't have a lot of time to meet people and you are not just sitting around thinking about what went wrong.If you don't have a lot of time like you claim that tells me that you have a lot of opportunity to interact with people and meet new people.

If you are busy at work then start interacting with the person at work that is the most social. Ask them for a pen or where you can locate the superviser. Even if this person is not you particular style it is a gaurantee that they can introduce you to one or two people that are. Highly social people are commended for interactiong with all types of people because there are usually diverse. The same applies at school. Sit next to the person that is the most outspoken and ask for their notes, a pen or whatever makes you feel comfortable. People feel good about themselves when other people ask them for anything because it gives them a feeling of reliability. Keep this up and you will see your self becoming more and more invovled.

Last but not least Patience. Do not expect to be the social butterfly tommorrow of even by next month. Example: When someone moves to a townor state inwhich they do not know anyone it takes a minimum of a year to develope a concrete social life and thats if they don't have a serious problem meeting new people. This also applies to you in a small but unique way. Give it about 2 to 3 months of persistance.

So be patient because as always good things come to hose who wait.