Does playing hard to get work?

[Sweetie8183]

Does playing hard to get actually work or is it too 1960's? Do guys like the challenge and mystery of a girl playing hard to get, or would you rather just have her throw herself at you?

[Cleo]

hi, Sweetie! throwing doesn't work, since everyone likes some time for themselves, I guess plain old "be your ordinary self" should do the trick. do you own thing: read, go to movies by yourself( I do, sometimes), paint, rollerblade(if it doesn't snow hehe).
what is the Guy part thinking?:daisy:

[Kaisharga]

I'd say the hard-to-get routine is unreliable at best. A few guys might think, "I must have her, and I WILL have her," but there will be the other guys that think, "Pheh. She's not interested, I should stop bugging her, because it's clear she doesn't want to be around me." These guys are the more rational guys, and unless you really really want to be dominated in your relationship, you probably want these second-category guys.

However, if you like the domination of a traditional patriarchial relationship, go for it.

--Kaisharga

[birdie444]

ofcourse it works!!
But to play the game, you must play it right. Guys are idiots (I know, I am a guy) They won't cherish anything presented to them on a silver platter, the harder they work on it, the more valuable they think it is...

But then, they also have a very short attention span, if they feel they don't stand a chance, or way beyond their reach, they'll give up.

So, its just like flying a kite, you gotta pull and release the "string" at the right time.

Have fun experimenting

[katty]

It weird... some guys like hard-to-get, some don't. I think you will just have to go with your intuition.

[Sweetie8183]

well what about throwing subtle clues at him that I like him, but not obvious ones...like smiling at him, touching his arm lightly, laughing at his jokes, being really friendly. So that it keeps him guessing and wondering if I'm interested in him or just being friendly.

[philcambron]

I hate it !!!!! lolllllllll

Women, if oyu want something from us, just be direct and don't make it harder unless the guy enjoys it... I am sincerly not enjoying it :-/ lollllllllll


Phil

[Kaisharga]

Heh, yeah, us guys are about as subtle as a Wrecking Ball.

--Kaisharga

[kris]

i think i agree most with bird. it's good when a girl shows some interest, enough to get a bite. after, she needs to stick to her guns. what i mean by this is, don't be a push over. hang out with the guy, but also tell him you'll call him later and go do girl stuff with the girls or other friends. this is kinda cool. if you want a relationship with him, you're telling him from the start that you still want to have your own life. i think it's sad when one side throws in the towel, ditches their friends, and plays the part of the submissive puppy. this also gets stressful on the dominant one.

anyway, playing games are tricky. if you're going to start it, make sure it doesn't get out of hand. keep things close.

kris

[RosaMystica7]

Current opinions? What do you think about the hard-to-get game?

[Miss Direction]

Playing "hard to get" is a crock at best. The main thing and way guys screw up all the time is they focus TOO MUCH attention on one girl. Go out and date all kinds. It's ok to be a man. If you go head first in a relationship with a girl you don't care for (that you find out later on down the road anyway) it's no good for the either of you. Girls on the other hand, don't have to worry about that. We all know women are the "stronger" (inside anyway) of the two. A guy has to make his indenture on his woman, for if he doesn't, it's a lost cause. On the flipside of the coin, many women that DO play hard-to-get, fail with me drastically....cause more often than not, they follow that p.o.s. book that they refer to as "The Rules". If you don't believe me, go look it up and read the statistics.

Besides, relationships and whatnot are hard to comeby now-a-days. Women need to feel that "attraction" for a man. Once it is gone, there are too.

I'm not being negative, merely stating the obvious. And as someone previously mentioned, if you want somebody, be yourself! There are plenty of fish in the sea. :)

[Miss Direction]

By "The Rules" being shown in a bad light, I mean most relationships fall apart after time, and the "spark" in it dies over short periods of time.

In summary, your trying to get the guy by being the book, not yourself. ;)

[JustMetoday]

there should be a 2 week limit on playing hard to get. After the 2 weeksare up, open up the gates.

[badboykilla]

YES

Play hard to get...not IMPOSSIBLE!!!;)

[hueffmea]

I've never been a believer in one strategy. If the guys seems to be enjoying it go for it, but remember if you're not carefull he'll shrug his shoulders and say, "I can take a hint."
Best to just be honest. Honesty never get's you in trouble unless you're not an honest person.

[Tatva]

Originally posted by Sweetie8183
well what about throwing subtle clues at him that I like him, but not obvious ones...like smiling at him, touching his arm lightly, laughing at his jokes, being really friendly. So that it keeps him guessing and wondering if I'm interested in him or just being friendly.


sure...this is a good idea ! no matter how much we guys hate hard-to-get stuff from girls , still i think thats literally what keeps us interested . But i agree with the other guys .....dont overdo it .
If u just keep on smiling at him, touching his arm lightly, laughing at his jokes, being really friendly , but play hard at other times U will either confuse the guy or make the guy lose confidence and he might start feeling " ok i dont think i got a chance here.....i better quit before i make a fool outta myself ) !

So just keep the glass half full , never keep it half-empty !!!!!!!

hope i hepled!

[jurupa]

Also if a girl is playing hard to get for more than 5 days for me, I stop trying to get her attention. Becuase once its 5 days it starts to look like more of a cold shoulder than hard to get. And whats the point of trying to get passed a cold shoulder from a girl that gives it?