View Full Version : is it goin down hill?
blaster6924
09-18-2002, 04:14 PM
hey, my girlfriend and i have been going out for over 3 months now. She has been acting kind of different then she used to. She always use to say sweet stuff and always talk to me. Now she doesnt really say anythin and i am the one who always has to start the conversations. And now she has to go out every day with her mom to do something. She says that she needs to get stuff done and it's not her fault that she has to go. And this is like an every day thing and i hate it. Then she always wants to go to bed at like 9-9:30. She always has to do chores and always has to go when her mom get's home and then when she is done dinner she calls me back. I told her it's not helping our realtionship that we can never talk and she says you have to get used to it and that it is not her fault. I only see her on friday's and saturday's because we live like 15-30 minutes away. I love her so much and she is the best girlfriend i ever had and i really want it to work. I just really hate that she always has to go and i can never talk to her anymore and it's like there is nothing i can do. Please help me! Thanks:
Sounds to me live she's making excuses for some reason or another. Did she used to have to go home to her mother all the time? If she didn't then something's up.
Just tell her the truth - tell her you're really upset and you want to spend more time with her because she is the most important person in the world to you. If she doesn't care and tells you to live with it then she either wants to break it off or she's incredibly stupid. Relationships only work if both parties contribute.
If you can't communicate or if she's not a least sorry about what's been happening lately I see no real reason to keep going with her. The fact that she still takes the time to ring you is a good thing - she wouldn't ring you if she didn't want to be with you anymore... unless of course she's vindictive...
So in short, I am even confused. :|
-Gan
voland
09-22-2002, 01:58 AM
DO NOT, tell her how much she means to you!
Withdraw from her, and get her to chase you for a change. You are not a challenge, and if you're not a challenge she'll find someone else who is. Ever wonder why young women go for "bad boys?" It's the challenge-factor working... don't be a chump.
It sounds like her mother/father have laid down some rules that she has to follow. You may not like them, but she has to go by them. When parents feel a relationship is getting out of control they will step in. How old is your girlfriend? Ask her what has changed. Talk to her, ask her what is going on. Meg
Originally posted by voland
DO NOT, tell her how much she means to you!
Withdraw from her, and get her to chase you for a change. You are not a challenge, and if you're not a challenge she'll find someone else who is. Ever wonder why young women go for "bad boys?" It's the challenge-factor working... don't be a chump.
"Challenge factor" hasn't really got anything to do with it. Last time I checked it wasn't a game Voland... :)
-Gan
voland
09-22-2002, 10:56 AM
You are so incredibly naive, Gan.
Steve
SarahMini
09-22-2002, 06:05 PM
Nah.. we women like a man that is not so much a challenge, but not one that will kiss our butts and agree with everything we have to say either. You have to have your own life outside of your girlfriend. But at the same time, make her a priority and save some time for her as well. The same goes for a girl with her boyfriend. If you can't or won't make time for eachother, then you just aren't going to be able to make it work. That's just not a relationship.
Originally posted by voland
You are so incredibly naive, Gan.
Steve
:) (I just love it when he bites)
-Gan
voland
09-22-2002, 07:37 PM
Well said, SarahMini. But I do think it has to do with being a challenge; it could be said of both sexes, that if you profess your undying love and devotion your partner he/she will know that they "have" you. And nobody respects a person whom they know they can control.
I guess it can be seen other ways; but when a person knows that their "mate" will walk away from them forever, should that person "cross the line," then that person knows that they have to mind their p's and q's or risk losing their loved one -- that's where the challenge lies.... can you keep your loved one?
(I just love it when he bites) -Gan
Spoken like a true homosexual, Gan.
angel143ml
09-22-2002, 09:20 PM
:angel6:
MAYBE YOU ARE SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME TOGETHER, AND SHE IS FEELING SMOTHERED? MAYBE YOU SHOULD GIVE HER A LITTLE SPACE AND DO SOME THING WITH THE GUYS INSTEAD OF TRYING TO BE WITH HER 24/7 SO TO SPEAK. THERE IS SUCH A THING AS TOO MUCH TOGETHERNESS. RELAX, GO OUT WITH THE GUYS AND DO GUY THINGS, LET HER GO OUT WITH THE GIRLS AND DO GIRL THINGS,:kitty:, MAYBE THAT'S ALL SHE NEEDS, GIVE HER TIME TO MISS YOU. OR PERHAPS YOU COULD ASK HER WHAT'S WRONG, AND MAYBE THAT WOULD BE QUICKER INSTEAD OF GUESSING?
:angel6:
Originally posted by voland
Spoken like a true homosexual, Gan.
I'm getting the impression that maybe you've a problem with me Volly? :)
Honestly, lowering yourself to calling someone gay is the height of childishness. Maybe those vegas lights are getting to your head?
-Gan
voland
09-23-2002, 09:35 AM
"Volly!"
Could you sound anymore gay?
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