How to make a move?

[bayo]

Hey guys,

I not very good with girls, but I'm doing OK meeting them and getting them to hang out with me. The problem is that I dun really know how and when to make the first move.

When I'm with a passive girl, even if the girl is interested, I dunno how start something. And we end up as good friends most of the time. Yes, as you might have guessed already, most of the my relationships started out with the girl being initiative... which is kinda embarrassing for me:)

Can someone give me some tips or examples of making the first move during a date?

Bayo

[pacifikix]

Hey Bayo - I know exactly what you mean. I am a bit of a shy guy as well and a lot of my relationships started where the girl made the initiative or the first move. I just got out of a pretty long relationship, and am trying to figure out how to be more assertive myself! Like you, a lot of the "passive" girls I have hung out with recently have ended up as friends (this is a good thing, everybody likes friends) but sometimes its hard to take it to a the next level. One thing I found was that these new girl "friends" were able to give me lots of good advice and insight into how to be more assertive the next time I have an opportunity! Here are three good tips that I've been given. 1) Compliment her: Everybody likes to get compliments, yet we seldom give them. It can be anything from her clothes, to her looks or personality. Put yourself in her position. How psyched would you be if someone you were getting to know came up and told YOU how cool you were? Trust me it works! 2.) If you are getting these girls to go out with you you are already halfway there. They wouldn't hang out with you if they didn't think you were cool. Don't be afraid to flirt and don't be oblivious to her flirting either. Take a step back from the situation and see if you are getting positive signals. 3.) The dreaded first move: Yes, you're going to have to just do it! That doesn't mean you have to just grab her and say "gimme some sugar baby!" Just be confident! If you've given her a nice compliment, you have already raised yourself a couple of points in her book, and a little flirting is a way of testing out how things are going already. If she has been responsive (i.e. not hit you over the head or completely blown you off) then its time to make your move. A close female friend told me something once which sounds cheesy, but it's true: You always miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Good luck, You da man!
:cool:

[reign226]

Nice advices there, although I recommend putting things in paragraphs to make them more readable. Otherwise, I love 'em.

Any advice on how to prolong a conversation? I have trouble doing those, and often my mind moves slower than my mouth. The former seems to be frozen everytime.